"When I read verse 26, the first thing I thought was, “Yes, I am wise and I do speak with wisdom”. Just as soon as I finished patting myself on the back, I realized there was another half to that sentence. Not just that instruction should be on my tongue, but kindly instruction. See, this is where it gets iffy for me."
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Guest post alert!
It is just the week of guest posts, I suppose! Today I am over at Meditatio talking about the inspiration I draw in my role as wife from Proverbs. Please check out the whole series... it is such a wonderful collection of thoughts and reflections! Here is a little sneak peek, but you'll have to click over to see the rest!
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I'll comment here since it's more private :)
ReplyDeleteNicole is you!!! We have been struggling a lot for the past month or so, where it almost feels like more bad than good because of how we've been communicating. Last night we had an amazing heart-to-heart and your post is what it came down to. She will always be more organized and orderly than me - I can make efforts to improve, but it will never be as second nature to me as it is to her. And she is permitted to feel frustrated by that and to ask me for help. But the way she does so is key, and that's what has been getting in our way. You sum it perfectly with:
"He is much more likely to pay attention to why I am saying something than how I am saying something when I speak to him the way he deserves."
The second I feel like she is being nasty or rude, or when I feel treated more like a child than like a wife, my attitude gets nasty in return and I don't want to participate in whatever it is she's asking for. I get caught up in how she's delivering the message and can't even focus on the message itself. Just today she has been more conscious of how she asks for help (or how she offers instruction, to use your language) and has found me to be much more cooperative and agreeable. I hope that positive reinforcement can help us keep it up. :)
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