To say I was a mess for that week would be a massive understatement. I wanted so badly to avoid an induction and wanted him to come on his own. I knew it was unlikely given that I was only in my 37th week, but I was diffusing and bathing in clary sage like crazy. I was short with the girls and just struggling so much with my own feelings and emotions.... until the day of the induction. I woke up that morning with SO MUCH peace. I think knowing there wasn't anything I could do to change it, removing that element of attempted control, helped me a lot! Steven was off that day and my parents were heading to our house. We had a really lovely morning with the girls. We didn't do anything special, but we were all in great moods and I felt like we really just enjoyed our last day as a family of four. It was everything I needed to be mentally and emotionally ready to go in for the induction. My parents got there and we all hung out until about 5 when Steven and I were going to head to dinner, and my parents were taking the girls to eat and go to the hotel. And that's when my precious 5 year old lost it. I think it all hit her that I would be gone and that big changes were happening. She sobbed and clung to me, and I cried quite a bit, too. It was so hard! Thankfully my mom text me soon after with picture updates of how much fun they were having. But man, that was so hard on my mama heart!
Steven and I went and had dinner at Chipotle, then ran to Dollar Tree for toothbrushes. I finally remembered to pack toothbrushes for the girls, but did not pack one for myself :). Then we headed to the hospital. We were super early so we just drove around for a bit before heading in. When we walked in, we told the security guard we were going to registration for an induction. He said he needed to call them (I was pretty sure he didn't need to....), and fumbled around with papers for a bit. I told him they were expecting us, and could we just head back? Then he fumbled with maps and couldn't find registration. I told him we knew where it was :). Poor guy. We headed back to registration and had to wait a bit. We saw signs saying children under 12 couldn't visit the hospital which gave me about an hour of panic because I had told the girls they could see me every day! I don't mind the policy during flu season, but was just bothered that no one warned me so I could prep them!
We headed up to L&D after I got delivered and a nurse took us into Clare's birthing room, L&D #3. I took that as good "mojo", being that her birth was so easy. The nurse did not seem personable to me, which made me nervous, because we've only ever had AMAZING labor and delivery nurses there. I really wanted that to continue. But thankfully, she warmed up pretty quickly... maybe was just overwhelmed when we came in? Either way, I was glad to see her warm up to us! The room was sweltering when we got in, so we asked her to lower the temp. I was sweating soooo badly under the gown and sheets! It felt so gross. I got the gown on and waited for our OB to come in. He came in later on and checked me and said I was 3 cm. I had been 2cm the week before and he seemed pleased. He placed cytotec and said I could take something for sleep if I wanted, but it was up to me. He offered me ambien or morphine. I declined both because I knew there was a chance I could go into labor that night and did not want to be feeling the effects of the medicine. That was potentially a mistake because that night was very hard! Now I know that the cytotec was working, but I also had a headache. I asked the nurse if I could have something for it, but she could only offer morphine because that's what the doctor had written an order for. I declined and just got through it, but I was contracting on and off, feeling some pain in my cervix, and my head was hurting. I woke Steven up once but otherwise let him sleep because I wasn't sure what the rest of the night (or the next day!) would hold and wanted to make sure one of us was well rested. I got a few cat naps but between being uncomfortable and the nurse needing to fix the monitors and check blood pressure, I only slept about 2 broken hours that night.
The next morning, I was over it and READY! They were supposed to bring me breakfast at 6, so at 6:30, expecting it would come at any point, I sent Steven to the cafeteria to get himself something. He came back about a half hour later and still no food for me. The nurse checked me and I was 4-5 cm, so the cytotec had definitely helped (it did nothing for my cervix when I was induced with Felicity). After a bit he asked if they were bringing me food before the pitocin got started. The night nurse and the day nurse, Pam, who was about to take over, sort of hesitated and looked at each other. The night nurse said "I'm going to let you make that decision". Turns out they were worried about me throwing up in labor because I was already almost 5cm. However, sweet Pam took pity on my and went and got some options from the staff room... some applesauce, cereal, and juice. I was nauseous because it had been 14 hours since I'd eaten and I still technically had gestational diabetes at that point! So I ate a little but that almost made me feel more nauseous so I stopped. Luckily it hit my system a bit later and I started to feel SO much better, and wasn't even noticing my headache anymore!
Stay tuned for more...
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